ROFL

Three newly married men were sitting in a bar together bragging how they had given their new wives housework duties.

The first man had married a woman from Albania.
He bragged that he had told his wife she was to do all the washing up, laundry, dusting and cleaning in the house.
He said that on the first day he didn't see anything but on the second day he came home to a clean house, the dishes were all washed and put away and the laundry too had been done.

The second man had married a woman from the Ukraine.
He bragged that he had given his wife orders that she was to do all the cleaning, washing up and the cooking.
He told them that the first day he did not see any results but the next day it was better.
By the third day his house was clean, the dishes were done, and he had a huge dinner on the table.

The third man married a girl from Liverpool.
He boasted that he told his wife that her duties were to keep the house clean, the dishes washed, the lawn mowed, the laundry done and hot meals on the table for every meal.
He said that on the first day he did not see anything, the second day he still did not see anything, but by the third day most of the swelling had gone down and he could see a little out of his left eye.