Tuesday, March 15, 2005

An interesting weekend...

It's Tuesday, and I'm sitting in my mate Ian's office, typing this out feeling a bit miserable.

So far, the weekend has been a bit of a worthless excercise for me personally.

I picked up an identical bag to mine on Friday night, and spent the next four days waiting for the other person to realise they had my bag. This meant I had to traipse around in one set of clothes till yesterday, I popped into Victoria on the offchance they'd had my bag handed in, and they helpfully pointed out it had been received on Sunday, but that they'd lost the contact details I'd left!!

Other miserable points this weekend:

One of my friends is in a dark place this weekend. Her mum has just been diagnosed with two brain tumours. This is kind of the last straw, as she already had breast cancer a few years ago, and at the moment she's been struggling with chronic lung disease. (She's been a smoker for years and never been able to stop).

My friend is obviously really upset at the moment, and as soon as I get back, I'm gonna try and visit her. There's not treally much to say, but I hope being there / hugs / strong tea / a shoulder to cry on will be enough.

Adele has been really really busy with church stuff, and I've only spent three hours in total with her, and we've not really had any quality time together. It wasn't her fault, and I certainly don't blame her, but it is frustrating when you come down to see someone, and then don't get the chance!!

Also, she's been offered a full time job at the church she's doing her gap year at, since she's impressed them so much. It's quite a responsible position for someone her age, (she'd kill me if she knew I'd said that! lol) She asked me what I thought about it, and I knew I had two available options:

1. be completely selfish and tell her to ignore the opportunity and apply for the Birmingham job, because it's nearer to me, and easier to travel to; or

2. recognize what God is doing in her life at the moment, and choose to encourage that, rather than stand in the way...

I HATE being a nice guy sometimes.

Needless to say, I chose the only option available. Sometimes following God means you have to sacrifice things that you want yourself to fulfill God's plan in other people's lives.

I'm really worried, as we're both so far away from each other, and she's so busy. I have no plans to move down to London, and couldn't even consider it financially at the moment. Not that I have a job to go to anyway!! I'm a little miserable about it all at the moment, although I obviously haven't shared this with her, as it's not my job to discourage, but to encourage her to be everytging she can be. It's an amazing opportunity, and one in which I think she'll excell, and grow. I see gifts in her and opportunities she has, that I never had, and I see a lot of potential in her work with children and young people. She has the motivation and the drive to run a youthwork ministry, and if she could just get more confidence in her own abilitoies, and see herself as I see her, then I think she'll really impact that area with her church.

As for me, I haven't a clue what God wants from me. I'm a bit jealous that God's leading is so obvious for her at the moment, but I guess that's life. I don't know how this is all going to work out, or whether it even will, but I guess that's where faith comes in. To trust when you don't know, to believe in a path when all you see is wilderness.

I'm signing off now, and I'm gonna try and get lost in London while Ian and Adele are in work!! Adele and I are going to see a show tonight, no idea what, but it's meant to be a surprise! It should be good, our tastes are quitre similar, and she's got really good taste.

Au Revoir my lovelies!!

:-)

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