Thoughts...

It's been a strange week.

You get alot of time to ponder when you have one of those "what am I doing with my life?" moments.

The last two weeks have been great, they've been a chance to think about where I've been the last few years, and to be honest it feels like treading water more than a journey. But maybe that's the wrong perspective.

Is life just there to order us on, us being helpless victims of the unwavering march of time, marching to the ticking of the clock? Sometimes it feels that way, that years go by and you wonder what you've been doing with your life, and can't actually recall anything significant...

Then something happens.

Someone dies, a close friend, a relative, someone asks for your help, a child is born, a sunset is watched, a deep conversation had; suddenly, you realise there's so much more.

Suddenly God breaks in, and even though it feels like you've been treading water, you know you've changed from the person you were, and you're becoming someone else.

Who?

You don't know, and the truth is, that's a source of fear and excitement.

Suddenly, the people you meet aren't all the same, they're individuals. The people you regularly talk to become more precious and less taken for granted. Complete strangers aren't strangers anymore, they're fellow people on the journey.

I may not have done much in terms of career or success in my life so far, but I've learnt lots.

People matter.

Money and possesions can be replaced, people can't.

When you see the tears of joy (and relief!) on your brother's face because he's just become a father, you know there is more to this life than we can see.

I want to be a person who enjoys the journey of knowing God rather than constantly looking toward my destination. I don't have to know what my "purpose" is, I just have to know he loves me.

In the end that's all that matters.